well , i guess this is th last picture taken together .

yes , im like down to earth's core right now .
pardon me fo i abandoned my blog lately .
good will is not on my side so yeah , that makes me not have any update .
life is really terrible fo me .
after one goes , here comes another part of it .
and i tell you , it is really unbearable .
mom has been bugging me about him .
my mom wanna meet him , but i know its not th time yet .
fo things got a little bit haywire between us .
i never wanna destroy you any further amir .
i had enough of playing all these endless game .
no one will win .
how am i going to move on when my mother really loves you ?
willing to accept you fo second time ?
my mom never behave this way before , and its even weird fo me .
if you think it is hard fo you , what do you think about my situation now ?
it came back to me in two fold .
how am i suppose to settle all these misunderstandings fo once ?
we need to talk , we really need to do it once and fo all .
i dont want it to be in a rush at all , i dont even want that to happen .
because i know rushing things will not bring any good .
i know i should take it slow , im sorry fo i go paranoid these few days .
but then i never wanna lose youu .
ouh gosh , what th hell is wrong with everything .

and this effing period of mine only lasted fo 3 days .
double pressure .
i know i have a low blood pressure , but it normally comes 5 days at most .
and NOW , it was totally clean by th third day .
i feel like i need to go to th doctor .
and check my entire body .
my cycle especially .
and now like what ?
im doing this alone lah nbcb .

HOW TH HELL AM I GOING TO SETTLE ALL THESE FO ONCE !
I CANT DO THIS ALONE
AND I NEED IS TO TALK TO YOU HAMIRUL HASRAFF .
I DONT KNOW HOW TH HELL AM I GOING TO REACH OUT TO YOU .
YOU WOULD IGNORE MY CALLS AND TEXTS WHEN YOU ARE OUTSIDE .
i know you need some time alone , but how th hell about me ?
WHEN IM HERE AT HOME , THINKING ABOUT YOU .
AS FAR AS IM ALIVE , I NEVER WANNA THROW SUCH ASSUMPTIONS ON YOU .
I KNOW AND I TRUST YOUR WORDS .
AMIR , I NEED YOU TO AT LEAST CALL ME NOW LAHH CANNN .
IM IN DEEP SHIT AND YOU KNOW THIS IS BETWEEN US .
YOU ALWAYS SAID THAT THINGS ARE SAID AND DONE .
BUT NO , IT GREW FATTER .
WHERE ARE YOUUUU ?
I NEED YOU NOWWWWW .
PLEASEEE CALLL ME ASAPPPPPP .
WE NEED TO CLEAR THESE THINGS .

i need some assurance from you .
running away is never good sayang , pleaseeeeeeee .
im down on my knees now , begging you to understand me .
how it feels like to be a girl . to know th whole truth . come on amir .
mercy mercy mercy .

and mommy , im really trying to make it work .
yes i know , and i never want to disappoint you anymore .
i need some help here .
things got out of hand man .